Well, this is a knitting blog and
I’ll try to keep it mostly about knitting. And yes, I’ve been knitting lately
and have some finished projects to share. But today I decided to talk about the
last hurricane – Irma – because I keep getting messages, mails, calls, and
posts on my Facebook wall with questions about it. I had to write this all down
and get it out of my system and this is my blog, so I can do as I please. Plus,
some people who are going through difficult times can relate to my experiences and
feel less lonely or, maybe, use my “anxiety avoidance” techniques. After all, that is why I keep posting here. When I started writing and getting
feedback it made me feel more normal or mainstream, more connected in the broad
sense of the word. It turned out there are quite a few kindred spirits in
different parts of this world who have same taste in knitting and same
priorities in life.
One more disclaimer – there will be no pictures in this post. I don’t like blogs without pictures myself but, sorry, they don’t seem to be appropriate this time. So, if you get easily bored without pictures, stop reading now. Today my goal is not to entertain but to give as much information as possible.
So here is my story and some “life lessons” that I hope
could be useful to anyone in an extremely stressful situation.
We went to the Florida Keys several days before we learned about
Irma and were supposed to spend a week there putting some finishing touches to
our new house. We had return plane tickets and a rented car with a full tank,
so when the mandatory evacuation was announced (all residents got the message)
we were ready. And it was announced 5 (!!!) days before the storm was supposed
to hit. So we had plenty of time to get ready for a hurricane’s arrival as well
as we could while waiting for the time of our departure. It was our first
hurricane on Keys so we were a little amateurish. Next time we’ll be better
prepared for sure.
How did we feel knowing that our new house that we spent 3
years building and surrounding area are going to be right in the eye of a
hurricane? Well, you can imagine. If you cannot (and apparently a lot of people
couldn't because they kept asking me) I’ll tell you.
1) I discovered that the expression “calm before a storm” is literally what happens
before a storm. The weather was great, everything was beautiful, peaceful, and
quiet. It was hard to believe that something of that magnitude was coming.
2) I knew that soon we’ll have to leave and the amount of damage from the storm
could prevent us from staying there, at least for a while, so I tried to enjoy and
cherish every moment.
3) Didn’t
work, because anxiety and fear have a paralyzing effect, at least on my brain.
Somehow, anticipating something that hasn’t happened yet is more difficult than
dealing with the aftermath of a disaster. For a while the only thing you are
able to do is looking into a void or playing a solitaire.
4) Sleep
becomes a luxury. It is not difficult to fall asleep but much more difficult to
stay asleep.
But stress, almost like sex, gets
better and easier with age. All my life anxiety and panic have been my faithful
companions so I had to learn how to deal with them. No, I don’t know how to “keep
calm”, I am all shaking and nervous inside, but I certainly can “carry on” as
usual because this is the only thing that helps you to get through days (and
nights).
I learned that the best thing to
survive the anticipation is to keep as busy as possible and to go on through
all the routine things that you normally do. It is hard, especially at the
beginning, but this is the best remedy from panic and depression. Also,
exercise. You’ve got to exercise as much as possible – the endorphins work
their magic and life doesn’t look too bleak after a long walk or a good swim. And
you sleep much better.
I was able to knit. To my own
surprise I knit quite a lot while we were traveling home to Pennsylvania and
waiting for the hurricane to finally happen. And afterwards. Knitting helps
with focus.
I don’t remember ever trying so
many new, time consuming recipes. Somehow cooking took a lot of nervous energy
from my body. And, since I had to taste my food all the time, it helped with
eating because I kind of lost my appetite for a while.
To avoid: watching news on TV.
That was the best thing that I could do to keep my cool. All necessary information
about the upcoming event you can find on National Hurricane Center’s website,
you don’t need a TV for it. This is where the news companies actually get their
weather reports which they all embellish with colors, graphics, and sound and
present as “breaking news”. The media made people scared. It is useful if you
want them to leave the dangerous area but after a while it gets old and a
little bit over the top. I was sitting in Miami International Airport with my back
to a TV set. Every time somebody would sit across and start watching TV I could
see how their faces changed. From calm and sober they became scared, fearful,
and sad. I wish they would give some useful information, like where we could
find gas, food, and water. Which airlines still have tickets and to what destination. Which
hotels, motels, or b&b still had vacancies.
Normally I am not a big fan of Facebook
but during the crisis time it became totally unbearable. Yet, at some point, my
husband found there a group of Keys residents and it was an enormous help. We
got all the information from there: regular posts from local government
officials, many survival tips, video and photo reports immediately after the
disaster, rules and regulations of how to get back, everything. I cannot thank
enough people who posted there.
Unfortunately, people who don’t
live in the affected area kept watching the dramatic news coverage and we
started receiving messages like “Get out of there!”. “What are you still doing
there!”, “Are you crazy!” in droves. Some of them – at 2 or 3 AM. Because we
have friends in Europe and Russia, and they were so worried about our safety
that the idea of time difference and the fact that we might be asleep didn’t
cross their minds. Some people were so terrified and emotional (not our
relative, btw), that it took a while and several messages back and forth to
calm them down.
I am infinitely thankful to all
the people who reached to us before and after the hurricane: there were so
many, I was genuinely surprised. And at some point my husband even said: “I am
suddenly glad that we don’t have that many friends because I am not sure how
many more times I can repeat the same things”. Yes, that’s us – mean and
sarcastic as usual!
We were perfectly safe all the
time. Our house and all houses built with accordance to the last Florida
building code withstood the 100 m/h wind, rain, and surge without significant
damage. To all my “snow birds” friends who read this blog – all Keys residents,
knitting club members, that I know, still have their houses.
There was a trailer park right
next to our property that was hit the most. And that was the place where all
the correspondents parked and took the pictures that were constantly reproduced
on TV. I immediately recognized the place and was appalled at how wrong and
non-informative this “information” was. It didn’t help anyone, it was false by
omission (most houses are standing), it was depressing and negative.
A couple of days after Irma hit the Keys I felt almost
sick when in doctor’s waiting room I heard two ladies discussing who was hit
most – Huston or Florida Keys (like there was a competition) – and deciding
that it was definitely Huston. Ladies, no one besides the first responders, was
allowed to go to the most destroyed and damaged places on Florida Keys,
definitely not TV people, so you have no
idea about the real damage and cannot even talk about it (these were my
thoughts but of course I didn’t say it aloud). I do find it a very bad taste to
make a humanitarian crisis a topic of small talk. But then I’ve been always
exceptionally bad at small talk.
When I saw the pleas from
newspapers correspondents to eye witnesses from Florida to call or to write to
them because they needed information for their articles (again, it was on
Facebook, of course), I got just angry. If you want to write about something,
go there and eye witness it yourself. Otherwise, it is very easy to retranslate
something that is not exactly true, or only partially true.
I understand that disasters get
particularly good ratings so they will always be a major part of news circle.
And schadenfreude is still inherent to human nature even though during Middle
Ages it was considered to be a sin. If you absolutely have to watch this type
of “news” and become emotional seeing other people’s suffering, here is the
best solution – send money to the charities in the affected area. Money can
really help and you’ll be able to sleep better.
As to the conversations like “Who
were the idiots that stayed on Keys through the hurricane?” and “Why would you
want to live in a place like that?, I shudder inside when I hear them.
You don’t know the situation and
other people’s reasons; you cannot possibly imagine the risks and rewards of
staying there, so it is not for you to judge.
And people live everywhere. In
Georgia where sometimes it is unbearably hot, and Alaska or Canada where
sometimes it is unbearably cold. In Pennsylvania even, where every winter there
are snow storms, and no electricity, schools and roads are closed, and you
cannot leave your house. And in Florida Keys where sometimes there are
hurricanes.
Florida Keys will be rebuilt and
people will be always living there because it is an incredibly beautiful place and
because all locals are incredibly resilient people. Now, I promised no pictures this time but I
have one – sunflowers for my friends from the Keys.
And I will write about knitting soon. It's a promise.
